VeganMoFo – What’s In YOUR Hot Dog?

The spirit of Halloweegan is taking over the blogosphere! Check out Lisa’s (Show Me Vegan) Eyeball Martini, and aTxVegn Witch Salad! Pure Halloweegan awesomeness!

So what’s with the hot dog title, you ask? We all know how disgusting hot dogs can be (except for veggie dogs). Who knows what kind of mystery meat they put in there, right? In the movie “The Naked Gun,” some guy even found a finger in his hot dog. Now THAT would be a scarring experience!

Mwahaha! Ladies and gentlemen, the cute food has left the building! If you find *anything* cute about this, then you should have your brain checked out by a professional. Le gross…

Ha! That’s SICK! You’ve probably seen those butter cookies that look like fingers that are called “witches’ fingers”. That’s what I was going to make. But then I was in the shower last night (for some reason I was thinking about how disgusting hot dogs were) when I remembered that unforgettable scene from The Naked Gun; and then it hit me-these Halloweegan fingers had to look like hot dogs!  Most of my ideas come when I’m in the shower or lying in bed trying to fall asleep at night.

So here’s how to make these disgusting-looking, yummy-tasting little treats. The fingers are pretty much the same as the Happy Vegan Ghosts and Pumpkins minus the chocolate (yes, I eat a lot of peanut butter). You will also need oval vanilla cookies, preferably vegan ladyfingers. Round cookies will work too, you will just have to cut them in half.

For the fingers:
1/2 cup smooth peanut butter (cold)
2 tbsp maple syrup (or other syrup to taste)
2 tbsp to 1/4 cup of soy milk or other non-dairy milk
1/4 tsp vanilla

Mix the peanut butter, syrup, and vanilla with an electric mixer. If the peanut butter mix is too dry and difficult to handle mix in the milk by the tablespoon. You don’t want it to be too soft and sticky though, just soft enough to handle. It should feel a little like play-doh.

Take small chunks off the peanut butter mix and roll them between your hands to form six logs. The logs should be about 3 inches long and 3/4 inches wide.

Take one of your oval cookies (or round cookies cut in half, rounded side up) and gently press the log onto the bottom of the cookie. This will be half of your “hot dog” bun. Take another half and press it on the other side of the log to add the other half of your “bun”. Both halves should meet (or come close) at the bottom like on my picture. Repeat with all six logs.

Now to shape the fingers, simply pinch one end of each log to make it more narrow and finger-like.

For the nails:
almond slices
strawberry jelly/jam (or other red colored jelly)

Dip almond slices in strawberry jelly and insert the dipped side into the pinched end of the logs. Press the almond sliced down gently.

To finish it up, I took a toothpick and drew some knuckles on the top of each finger. You could squeeze some jelly on top, as if it was ketchup, but I didn’t feel like it.


  1. says

    those are so disgusting looking. which is AWESOME! the strawberry “blood” dripping out of the nails looked really nasty.

    at first I thought that you had whittled down hot dogs :)

    I think the knuckles need some very fine coconut hair on them.

  2. says

    I clicked on your blog’s name in Google Reader and was thinking to myself “can’t wait to see what cutesy stuff she made up this time” and then I quickly thought ‘Yuk, what is THAT?’ ;-)

  3. says

    Hi River,

    You are right, these cookies are a far cry from cute. On the plus side, they show that you have a pretty awesome sense of humor.

  4. says

    you are way too talented….
    i am repulsed yet intrigued all at once….
    deliciously grotesque….that is a hard combo to deliver nevermind master….
    is a vegan allowed to say i want to eat fingers?…
    well they are now…
    i want to eat fingers :)

  5. says

    oh my gosh, River – those are totally creepy and i super love them! i also love naked gun and now i want to watch them all again and again! ahahahaha! yay! you’re awesome, River! i love it all!

  6. says

    Ahhh! Those are so great! If they weren’t peanut butter I don’t think I could take a bite.

    I get out of bed many nights to go write down food ideas.

  7. says

    Eww, but yummm! haha when I first saw them I cringed but then when I heard what was in them =)

    What do the “buns” part of the recipe taste like? Are they sweet or just plain? I don’t know why but they sound really good to me right now. Just a simple, plain cookie.

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